The note at the VA dental front desk says, “Please check in at the kiosk. Thank you.”
Naturally, I check in at the kiosk. Because of my conditioning and socialization, I don’t presume to think that I deserve special treatment. Old white male goes to the front desk to check in and the woman checks him in.
The privilege isn’t just that she didn’t tell him to use the kiosk, as they have done me in the past, the privilege is also the fact that he walked past the kiosk, ignored the sign, and went to the front desk *expecting* the women to check him in for his appointment.
Privilege isn’t just about “getting stuff,” it’s also walking through this world expecting stuff – expecting to be first, expecting that the rules don’t apply to you, expecting people to wait on you and for you. Expecting to be deferred to, and of course, expecting to be allowed and accepted everywhere, invited or not.
I see it a lot on the road too – white males (deliberately) pull out in front of me, expecting me to slow down for them, turning on their turn signal and thinking they have the right of way, etc.
They don’t just *think* they deserve more, they believe it and walk through life expecting it to be handed to them.
Unfortunately, the rest of us are completely conditioned and socialized to give them what they want and not fight it – even getting mad at the few who *do* fight it.
Like when I brought this up to the dental assistant, she gave the excuse that they just refuse to use the computer (to be clear, it’s a touch screen monitor – you stick your VA ID in it, then answer a few Qs, the end). I said, “it’s probably white males doing that, huh?” She blinked and said, “well, yeah, I see your point.” I told her I saw hers as well, because like I said, we are conditioned to give them what they want.
What I failed to point out because I just now thought of it is that they have to use the kiosks in the pharmacy and lab. If they “don’t know how” or “don’t want to,” they have to have someone help them because those two places require us ALL to check in via the kiosk. So crying about it in dental or another clinic is just them imposing their will onto a woman and expecting her to do the work for him by checking him in instead of being firm and insisting he use the kiosk like everyone else.
What’s the big deal? They are taking these women from their other duties: answering the phones, checking patients out, setting up return appointments, and the list goes on. They have to stop doing all of that to cater to these men; and the men expect it.
Imagine how hard these men would fight to keep things like this. That’s why male gamers attack female gamers and developers both on and offline. It’s why male transgenders (TIMs) are so violent towards women, again, both on and offline, who refuse to share in their delusions; and TIMs and their handmaidens are laughably ok with being violent towards women, calling their violence “self-defense.” It’s why the man who caused my accident became angry and fought his illegal lane change citation. White men expect the rest of us to cater to their wants and needs, no questions asked.
They won’t give up their power without a fight; and the women who can’t see past their own conditioning will always help men fight to stay in control.
That’s why radical feminists are so hated: we fight against our conditioning and internalized misogyny and we fight for women’s liberation from male supremacy. Women’s liberation from men.