This was a response to my blog on male privilege. Usually, I ignore these rants of theirs, especially when it is clear they did not actually read my post, but just decided to turn their rage for the day onto me for being a woman and having my own opinion. But this one was so over the top, so incredible, that I felt I should share it and post about it.
First of all, projectz975, thank you for proving my point by going right to the anger and name calling. The only thing missing, of course, is how I should “die in a fire,” or some other such nonsense.
Secondly, really? THAT’S what you got from my post? Did you even read it or did you just skim a bit and then go off the deep end into a rage that even you can’t explain?
If you would, please tell me where I mention how transwomen have no right to be upset about whatever it is that upsets you on any given day. Then, let me know the passage where I mention chromosomes of any kind. Then, find for me the spot where I mention how you are agry (sic) because you are a sexist man; also, point out where I used the word sexist, at all.
Finally, do me a favor and point out to me where in my post I treated you or anyone else “like shit.” I believe my post was about male privilege and how transwomen still have internalized male privilege, especially when speaking to and dealing with women. I also mentioned that unless transwomen do the work by examining and combating their privilege, things will never change.
Your hatred for women is very clear in your rant, as is your inability to read and comprehend something very simple and straight forward. I find the depth of your rage over something as simple as a woman pointing out that men have male privilege to be somewhat telling and I have to wonder if maybe you should talk this over with your therapist so that the two of you can get to the root of your anger and hatred towards women.
I do thank you for this rant though, projectz975, as it illustrates perfectly exactly what I am talking about in my post and, honestly, the more women that see this kind of extreme behavior brought on without provocation the better.
Tell a man no, and they show their true feelings.
Every single time.
Personally I find this to be sad. I know there are people out there who do all the things you have pointed out, just as there are hateful, spiteful people in any group. Yet they are not all of us, but being so vocal, at least online, their voices drown out any others.
I can only speak for myself of course, but I do believe women need their own space away from men and a pre-op transwoman should not feel welcome there. I don’t know, this just seems to be common sense to me. Men never seem to consider what it would feel like to have their own spaces violated, in many ways it seems like a bad joke to them… the wife who takes over and transforms the “man cave” into a sewing room… they just don’t take such things seriously.
As you point out, this is very much an example of male privilege and no matter how much we may hate to face the truth, at some point every tanswoman has made use of such privilege, often without thought. If someone doubts it try a simple test, speak to mechanic as a male, then come back a few days later and do the same presenting as female. Privilege quickly becomes clear in such situations.
I also agree we all need to take a long hard look inside ourselves and to understand just how much we are affected by the messages we are taught by society every moment of our lives. Television, movies, music, advertisements… the list is endless. To deny the reality serves no purpose and only leads to greater division.
I hope you can see, not everyone is like your commenter. Such behavior is simply unacceptable from anyone, I don’t care who you are, where you are from, or why you feel you have a right to treat someone in such a disrespectful way. We may or may not agree and there is nothing wrong in acknowledging such truths, but should always seek to treat one another with respect and dignity… until one or the other has proven they are worthy of neither.
“I hope you can see, not everyone is like your commenter.”
I do see that, yes; and I also see transwomen out there who feel as you do.
Male privilege is as tricky and sneaky as white privilege. Sometimes I find myself walking away from an encounter, replaying the events and I realize that things just went differently for me because I am white; and I feel badly that I didn’t see it in the moment so I could stop what was happening right then and there.
But for a lot of men, doesn’t matter if they are gay, straight, trans, or not, they just don’t see their privilege because they don’t have to; just like I don’t have to see my white privilege because I am white. The oppressor never has to look at those things, but the oppressed have to see it every single day. So it is my job as a white person to examine my white privilege and combat it, just as it is men’s responsibility to examine and combat the male privilege they have had all of their lives, up to the moment society sees them as women and treats them as such.
I would think that transwomen would be uniquely qualified to speak on male privilege, having been on both sides of the fence, but a lot of transwomen don’t see their privilege before passing, they deny they ever had any kind of privilege, then or now. So instead of combating the privileged attitudes inside of themselves and building bridges with other women, they treat us like every other man out there treats us: they talk at us, call us names (another Tumblr poster called me a bitch, and this one did not read my post either but had a lot to say about it), they resort to violence and rape threats, etc.
The easiest thing for them to do would be to examine the privilege they lived with all of their lives and combat it, see things from the perspective of the women they feel they are and treat the rest of us with kindness and respect. Unfortunately, the internal privilege they still carry with them prevents them from doing that and so the cycle continues: they bash away at us, trying to bully us into submission when we don’t accept their reality as our own.
Thanks for your thoughts,
You make a very good point. Privilege infuses society on so many levels; it’s an almost invisible poison. It’s not until we force ourselves to open our eyes, or have them forced open, that it begins to come clear. Even then it takes hard work, dedication, and honesty to admit the truths within ourselves.
Race, gender, sexuality, religion, even income… all of these things carry the weight of privilege It isn’t until someone finds themselves on the other side that this becomes clear.